Catching up!

I realized I've failed to chronicle some things I know I will want to reflect on later, so here's the quick and dirty on my running adventures!

Ran my second 23 miler in Orlando, after being on the road for 9 days! Not literally on the road, but away from home. Tyler and I ran this on a Sunday, after spending the Saturday before at Universal Studios & Islands of Adventure. His work had their Spring Picnic there so I got into two parks with lunch for $20, pretty sweet. The week leading up to this I spent down in Jupiter helping my cousin with her 3 month old twins, because her husband was out of town for the week. My sleep schedule was pretty erratic but managed to keep up with my scheduled mid-week runs, which actually surprised me.

So, given the week's events I wasn't very confident going into the 23 miler. We ran an out and back on the West Orange Trail. Started out "slow" and then got progressively faster, our last mile was 7:54! Our average pace was 8:22 min/mile, I hadn't planned on us running that fast, but we felt good! It was the furthest Tyler had ever gone during a training run, so I was pretty proud of both of us.

The next Saturday 3/20 I ran in the first Trail of Payne 10K here in Gainesville. It was held at Payne's Prairie State Park and was mostly trail. It was really fun, perfect weather for a race, a bit chilly, nice and clear. Given the intense emotional week I had before it I had low expectations of my performance, but I ended up doing better than expected with a 46:53 time which got me 1st place in my age group! Pretty fun I must say!

It's funny how racing really does bring out the best in us. I very rarely feel like I could run 7:30s for 6 miles during a training run. So it's always surprising to crank them out on race day.

Hoping to solidify my Vancouver plans very very soon! My ticket WILL be purchased this week and I hope to book a place and car. This trip has changed a lot since the fall. What was going to be a big group of peeps in a house, might end up just being me and my friend Scott who lives out in Portland. I know it will be fabulous no matter what, because this is my big marathon dangit!! Seriously, even though things have changed drastically from my initial expectations, I will make the most of this trip!

Tampa GUR 2010 Details

So when preparing for the Great Urban Race in Tampa on March 6th, Tyler and I stumbled upon someone's blog giving a list of all the clues and answers as well as photos used. We found it very helpful in trying to understand what we might encounter, so I wanted to return the favor to future GUR teams!

Our team name was Pants On The Ground, which got us a #4 in the Stand-out Team Names list!

Strategy:
We took a laptop because the bar where the race starts (Gaspar's Grotto) had wireless internet. We received the clues at about 12pm and worked on answering them between using the laptop, calling a friend who was online helping, and calling local knowledge peeps. Once we solved the clues and planned out our route we hit the streets and ran really FAST. Not being familiar with Tampa we had a disadvantage in solving some of the clues, it took us almost 40 minutes to hit the streets. But once out there we figured we averaged about a 7:45 min/mile giving us a 20th place finish = qualified for Nationals!

Order in which we did the clues:
Part of 10, 7, 3, Part of 10, 4, 1, 1st part of 12, 2, 8, 6, 9, 2nd part of 12, Part of 10, accidentally skipped 5 so did that last, chose to not do #11, took that as our 1 freebie (couldn't figure it out!)

Clues (in the order they appeared on our sheet):
1) Get ready for the Chipotle Challenge! Make your way to Lykes Gaslights Park and find the Chipotle staff. One teammate must successfully throw a bean bag into the hole in the boards provided. The teammate throwing the bean bag must be blindfolded while another teammate verbally guides them. Once completed, you must receive a stamp on this clue sheet from the Chipolte staff to receive credit for this clue.

*This was downtown, easy enough to find location online. Park on the corner of Madison and Tampa. Tyler was the one who was blindfolded and it took maybe 10 throws to sink the beanbag. Didn't need a pic for this one, just the stamp on our sheet as proof.

2) Make your way to 901 West Platt Street and find the animal handlers on the outdoor patio. Take a picture of all teammates holding ONE of the creatures waiting for you.

*This was our second stop after crossing over from downtown into the Hyde Park area. We got to hold the Iguana! It was easy to find because the address was given

3) This clue will require two steps!
First, make your way to King Corona's Cigars Cafe and Bar and solve the puzzle hanging in the window. Once solved, fill in the circled word from the puzzle in the boxes on this clue sheet below.

Second, take a picture of all teammates in front of the wooden Native American statue in the window at King Corona's. To receive credit for this clue, you must have BOTH the word and the puzzle written on this clue sheet AND a picture of all teammates in front of the wooden statue.

*This was just two blocks down from the bar where we started. Hit this up after we did clue number 7. We didn't write down all the pieces of the puzzle that we solved, but they were questions like: What famous wrestler calls Tampa home (Hulk Hogan), 2003 Super Bowl Champs (Buccaneers), Florida lake over 700 square miles (Okeechobee). All the answers led us to answer of PIRATES, in our little fill in blank thing. Then we took a picture in front of the wooden Indian in the window.

4) Unscramble the letters below to find the location of this clue, located in downtown Tampa. Take a picture of all teammates standing next to this sculpture.
REHTA YENRGE

*This one was tough. I first unscrambled this as Heart Energy and we were unable to find anything under that name online. Luckily our internet phone a friend, Bill figured out it also could be Earth Energy. Once we looked that up, we were able to find that it was on the corner of Tampa and Twiggs, downtown.

5) Let's ride! Make your way to City Bike Tampa and complete the bike challenge waiting for you. Once completed, you must receive a business card from the staff as proof of completion.

*We somehow missed hitting up this one, located near the corner of Cass & Tampa downtown, on the way out. So, we did this one last on the way back to the bar. It was a simple task, each teammate had to ride a bike around a set of cones, maybe a 25 ft distance. Then we were given a business card as proof, no picture needed.

6) Make your way to the field at Hyde Park Art Studio and complete the soccer challenge. Once completed you must receive a Tampa Bay Club Sport magnet from the staff as proof of completion.

*This physical challenge was having to make either one goal with the soccer ball while not hitting any of the inflatable refs placed in the goal, or make 3 goals, hitting as many refs as needed. Tyler took the shots and made 3 goals in a row, got our magnet and moved on. No picture here either.

7) Take a picture of all teammates posing with the statue pictured to the right.

*This was our toughest clue. Not being from Tampa we had no idea where this was. We called our local friends and sent them a picture via cell phone, no luck. We ended up asking a woman at the bar and she said she thought it might be just up the road in Ybor. When we looked up Ybor statue we found it (but never came up under Tampa Statue). It's the Ybor Immigrant Statue and is located on the North Side of Centennial Park, 9th Ave & 18th St.

8) Hang ten! Make your way to the Hyde Park Village fountain to learn how to ride the waves. Once completed, take a picture of all teammates striking a wacky pose on a surfboard.

*Once we got to Hyde Park Village the fountain is easy enough to find, lots of other teams being there also helps! Tyler had to take a "surf lesson" which was pretty short and then we had our picture taken on the board.

9)Make your way to the Smoothie King on Swann Street where you will find a delicious "boost" waiting for you. Take a picture of one teammate pouring the smoothie into another teammate's mouth with a Smoothie King sign clearly visible in the picture.

*This was easy enough since we were given the street name, just looked it up online. Went in got our mini smoothie and I fed it to Tyler in front of a cooler with a Smoothie King logo on top.

10) Tic-Tac-Toe! This clue will require three separate pictures. You team must complete 3 of the nine challenges listed in the tic-tac-toe squares to the right. The three challenges you complete must be in "tic-tac-toe" order - either 3 boxes in a vertical column, 3 boxes in a horizontal row, OR 3 boxes on a diagonal. NOTE: All required items in the pictures must be clearly visible. "Strangers" must be non-GUR participants.

*This clue had a grid of 9 tasks. We ended up doing 4, changed our tic-tac-toe direction as we went. The three tasks which made up our tic-tac-toe were
1)Return to the finish with a real job application - we went into a couple places along our route, but ended up finally getting one at a Subway downtown.
2)Take a picture of at least one teammate shaking a dog's paw - This was actually the first picture we took. We were still in the bar and there was a guy there with two puppies.
3)Take a picture of all teammates with a real boat in the background. (Toys and pictures of boats will not be accepted) - We first had our picture taken when we were crossing into Hyde Park area, with a crew boat in the background. On our way back from Hyde Park into Tampa we decided to have our picture taken again in front of a more obvious boat, just in case.

The task we completed that we didn't end up using in our tic-tac-toe was - Take a picture of all teammates posing with a stranger standing on a skateboard. We came across these two guys on our way into downtown and had our picture taken with them. We realized later that they weren't actually standing on their boards. Oops.


11) Riddle: Ms. Shield is odd. She likes balloons but doesn't like parties. She likes books but doesn't like reading. She likes weeds but doesn't like flowers. She likes swimming but doesn't like water. She likes letters but doesn't like words. She likes noodles but doesn't like pasta sauce. She likes apples but doesn't like plums. She likes coffee but doesn't like tea.
According to the pattern in the riddle above, take a picture of all teammates in front of a street sign that Ms. Shield would LIKE. The street sign must be clearly visible and easy to read in the picture.

*You are allowed to skip 1 clue, this is the one we chose to skip. We had no idea. Turns out it was painfully obvious. Ms. Shield likes things with repeat letters. But we didn't find that out till we finished. Apparently all the other teams had trouble too, when we arrived at the check in area after finishing the woman told us that 6 teams had received penalties for not figuring out the clue properly. Glad we skipped it!

12) This clue requires three steps

First, purchase one of the following options (a, b, OR c). All items should be new and unused
a) A reusable plastic water bottle
b) A reusable hot beverage tumbler
c) A golf-type, small sports towel
Second, bring your item to the lobby of 1510 West Swann Ave and donate them to the Center for Autism & Related Disabilities (CARD). This non-profit organization provides information and consultation to individuals diagnosed with autism spectrum disorders and related disabilities.
Third, you must receive a flyer from the CARD staff as proof of donation.

*We ended op stopping at Publix on our way into Hyde Park from downtown. We asked the staff there and they said they were all out of water bottles, but then a kid working there found us one. Sweet! We put it in the backpack and planned on going to donate it when we got closer to Hyde Park Village. We had difficulty finding it, as we were looking for the actual Center for Autism. We finally found the location, it ended up being our last stop before heading back towards downtown. They were accepting donations inside Lifestyle Fitness in Hyde Park Village... tricky!
_____
After we completed all our clues we started running back to the bar in Ybor from downtown. Tyler went over all the clues to make sure we had everything and asked me a couple times if we had a magnet from the Soccer Challenge. I knew I was handed something upon completing the task, but then started doubting myself. We stopped and looked through our items, and I couldn't find the magnet. I got pretty upset that I hadn't checked earlier. But, Tyler was the voice of reason and reminded me that maybe we did have what we needed and at this point it was worth just heading back and just taking the 30 min penalty, rather than trying to go and get a magnet.

Funny, although not too funny at the time, thing is our backpack kept coming open as we were running and random items would fall out. This was not good, as Tyler's wallet fell out several times. But, as I was in my magnet despair the backpack opened again, and out fell the magnet! Perfect! We ran as fast as we could and passed at least 5 teams as we got closer to the finish.

Did I mention our biggest advantage was our running ability!?

Such a fun time, the post race hangout outside at Gaspar's Grotto was fabulous. It was a beautiful day. Can't wait to write another entry in November after Vegas!!

50+ Mile Weeks

I'm presently trying to enjoy the down time of my Recovery Week. Last week I logged 56 miles. It started off with a 23 mile run on Saturday, which went really, really well. I logged 1 mile solo, 10 miles with the FTC Boston gals, and 12 with the rest of the Saturday morning FTC group. Kept my overall pace under 8:30, and it felt extremely comfortable. I even got this amazing 2nd wind at around mile 20, big confidence booster! The next week went well too, I was surprisingly full of energy despite the near marathon on Saturday 2/20.

Last Saturday was my big birthday run. My big 30th birthday was Friday and I went out to dinner with Jacque, Diana, Chrissy, Megan, Sam, Bill & Tyler. Saturday Tyler and woke up early, got out of our freezing cold tent (yes we camped out in the yard), and went to meet up with the brave FTC souls. I felt so honored that Han, West, Albert, Diane, Gaye, Mark & Albert's son Andrew came out and logistically conquered our Hawthorne Trail day! It was really cold and rainy, quite unpleasant weather wise, but we still had a great time. Some people did 8 miles, some 12 and then we did 16.5ish.

During the run I noticed a little tightness in my left knee, but didn't think much of it. By the time Saturday night rolled around and the birthday party was hoppin' out here on the Moore farm, my knee was feeling rough. Sunday I was a bit worried, glad it was a zero mile day.

Monday I ran in my new Vibram Five Fingers shoes, knee felt really good actually. Tuesday morning I woke up and it was pretty bad, chose to forgo my 60 min tempo run and log a big fat 0 instead. Wednesday I ran 30 minutes and it was pretty painful for the first mile but then felt really really good, and felt good the rest of the day. Thursday (today) I woke up with pain again, grrr... Ran anyway, did 50 min. The first mile was rough but felt really good after that. Apparently it feels great when I'm running and for hours after, dang tendons! My guess is tendinitis, but ice actually makes it feel worse, so who knows!

I'm hoping it goes away soon, although I'm grateful that running feels better than walking! This came out of nowhere, I've never had pain in this area before and with very little warning on top of it. My guess is that it might have something to do with the 8.5 mile trail run I did last week, maybe used some muscles differently than I have in awhile, that combined with the 56 miles that week. Hey, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, right!?

Here's to healing quickly!

Conquering the Yassos!

Last night I finished 6 Yassos (over half way to 10!) each 800 in under 3:30!

Five Points 1/2 left my right calf surprisingly sore, that combined with some tummy cramps yesterday made me feel a little unsure about doing Yassos last night. But, I put on my new Florida Track Club singlet and warm-ups and headed for the track.

Did a 15 minute warm-up around campus then came back to the track, stripped down to my shorts and singlet and hit the Yassos. I'm so grateful that I have the opportunity to run on such a wonderful track that is UF's. It's really spoiling that rubber surface and just the atmosphere of the collegiate scene. I love it when the hottie track stars (God their strides are BEAUTIFUL, I seriously fall in love!!) are there running in Lane 1, always Lane 1, it makes me feel a part of something.

I remember the first time I attempted the Yassos and only did 3, and on the last one I totally tanked. Last night I felt like I could have done 7 or 8 or 9 or more, which was really encouraging. Each week I think about my Vancouver running buddy Laura who has already gotten up to 8 or 9, it keeps me going knowing I need to keep up with her. The weekend before Five Points Laura ran a 1/2 Marathon in San Fransisco, her time was 1 second faster than mine! I LOVE the fact that we are running on opposite coasts using the same training plan and seeing the same results. It's truly amazing how the human body responds!

Tonight I'm heading out to run with the Florida Track Club for a hilly route, I'm so happy I've slid into the Gainesville running community recently. Fit, encouraging, fun, positive people. Runners rule!

Valentines

Well it's one of my least favorite days of the year, Valentines Day. I now have a solution to my aversion to this Hallmark invented holiday, RACING!

Today was the Five Points of Life Marathon and Half Marathon here in Gainesville. It's our biggest and longest distance event here in town. Today was my third time doing the Half Marathon. I finished in 1:41:25 and placed 2nd in my age group! I was running with two guys from the Florida Track Club and we had a goal of 1:40:00. We didn't make it, we all came in around the same time, but two of us PR'd despite the missed goal, so all was well!

We started out with 7:45 min/miles for the first 6, hills are pretty intense during those miles and then our strategy was to take off after that. Oh it was 28 degrees at the start! I had my fuel belt so didn't stop at the water stations, so after mile 7 or so I was ahead of Albert and West, but they caught up to me in the last mile. My legs were pretty heavy after the first 6 miles so I wasn't able to go as fast as I'd hoped, but I was very happy with beating my PR by 3 minutes! One strange thing is my feet fell very fast asleep, I literally couldn't feel them, around mile 5 and it lasted for like 3-4 miles. It was kind of a scary feeling to not feel your feet AT ALL while you are running! But, I'm guessing it was something to do with the way I was running the hills, my leaning or foot strike or something, because once it flattened out for a bit it subsided. Thank goodness!

It's really crazy to think back that 2 months ago I struggled so badly at the OUC 1/2 in Orlando with Tyler, coming in almost 20 minutes later than my time today! CRAZY!! I feel like a different person, in more ways than one.

There is this drive in me that has been quieted with the housewife life, and now I feel like it's bubbling over. I feel youthful and goal oriented, feelings I haven't felt since grad school. It's an interesting journey...

Today I'm reminded of why I began hating Valentines, goes back 13 years. I went to a party with my longtime boyfriend and fought the whole night and then he broke up with me in the morning. We ended up getting back together and dating off and on for a few more years, but I guess I maintained some PTSD from that, combined with my natural aversion to anything contrived which Valentines Day seems to be to me.

So here I am 13 years later, in a stable, loving relationship with my husband of 5 years. I still don't like the day, but it's more like a non-event. We don't really celebrate, I guess we really don't celebrate too many holidays with gifts, some people find it strange... maybe it is. But today, he came out to my race and met me at the end and was impressed and proud, which was good for my heart, I'll take that over a box of Wal-Mart chocolates any day.

Happy Day everyone. I hope you are loved and love, real, non-commercialized, non-packaged kind of love.

Back to Basics

This week was a tough one, but good in the way of introspection.

The high from the 15K last Saturday was great. But, where there are highs there are lows. This week I just felt worn out. Come mid week my legs were heavy, and I had a tough time keeping my Marathon Goal Pace (MGP) for 35 minutes on my Wednesday run. I've set my MGP at 7:55 min/miles, so it was a bit disheartening to struggle for 35 minutes at that speed when on Saturday I kept a 7:35 pace for 9.3 miles. But, that's why I'm not supposed to try and run a race every day I suppose.

Thursday I traveled down to Orlando and ended up squeaking a run in with Tyler before his soccer game, which I ended up filling in as one of their girls (only 5 of your 8 players can be guys). Run was great, as it always is with him, soccer was fun, even though I was beyond rusty. I think I paid for it the next days with some calf issues, getting old sucks because apparently you can't just play a random sport without some minor consequences.

Friday I was slated for 60 minutes with some strides mixed in but opted for a day off, as I was getting a clear message from the old body that she needed a rest. The next day I was running the run portion of an equestrian, mountain biking, running relay. Friday was a super fun day, I actually spent the early part with my dear friend Heather and the later part with Tyler and a myriad of his work friends. We started at 3pm with a baby shower/happy hour, then moved to another happy hour downtown, then another bar, and then ended the night at the UCF USF hockey game, getting into bed around 2am. Note: drinking from 3-10 with little water in between is not the best way to prepare for a wake up time of 6:30am to run 4 miles in the woods.

Saturday morning I realized I was not invincible and that dehydration and lack of sleep does in fact impair your physical and mental functions. My main problem that developed post Newnan's Lake run was I got cocky.

I ran decent on Saturday but felt terrible. The post race drive was probably the worst part. I was on the verge of tears for various reasons, all of which were a bit blown out of proportion by my physical state.

So what did I learn, or more importantly, what would I have done differently? I'm not sure. The obvious answer would be to have drank less beer and more water, or maybe eaten better, slept longer. But, I'm not sure that I would do those things in retrospect (well maybe the more water part). I had a really great time with good people that I don't see too often, and even though I don't like to invite it, humility is necessary, and I'm better for it.

Sunday I needed to run for 2 hours and 30 minutes, which equaled about 17 miles. Given my Saturday breakdown I was really nervous about hitting the pavement for that amount of time. The run turned out to be perfectly wonderful, weather, route, even my broken down body did great. It felt really nice to not worry about speed and just go, concentrating on form. What a perfect way to end a volatile week, it helped me find the old me.

Will I drink for 7 hours before my marathon in May? No. Will I try and keep my ego in check? Yes.

Newnan's Lake 15K

What a great morning! For whatever reason this is my favorite Gainesville race. It's simple, no frills out and back 15K (9.3 miles) on Newnan's Lake in East Gainesville. Florida Track Club puts it on and I just love it. This year was especially high inducing!

The weather was really perfect. Years past it's been colder, which is fine once you get going but the pre-race always feels a bit miserable. This was perfect before and during.

My goal for the day was 1:12:00, I ran a 1:10:51. Nice, felt great!

I did get passed at the very end by two girls, which put me 14th overall woman finisher (I think!). I came in 4th in my age group so I just missed an award... oh well! I was stoked by my time so that's what matters. If I had been one month older I would have placed 2nd, so that was encouraging!

Jacque, Diana and Chrissy all ran so we rode to the race together. All of them have been resting more than running lately, but I thought they all did great! It was nice to have friends around for a run that could be happy for each other and enjoy a great day.

The first call I placed was a text to Tyler, after all he was the one that helped me decide on my goal time. I swear the 2nd half of the race I was just hoping to finish below my goal so I could tell him the good news. It's such a great feeling to have someone that knows exactly what it takes to meet a goal, be proud of you. Don't get me wrong Bill and my friends and family are so great at rooting for me, but when someone has done all the hard work and can come alongside you while you do yours and genuinely be impressed and proud... priceless! His confidence in me is one of the main themes of this season of running. I really can't imagine this training without him.

After the race Bill and I drove down to Orlando to take Amy's kids to the Science Center. During the drive down I told Bill that I don't know of a better feeling than a post race bliss, it's really one of the best ways to start my morning! The Science Center was fun, I think the kids had a blast. Truthfully I'd rather run 30 miles everyday than be a parent to 3 kids at this stage in my life. It's completely exhausting, and I question that I will ever get to the place of wanting children. I love kids, I really do, but I know that I would want to give them 100% of me, and I don't think I could sustain that. But that is a whole other type of blog!!

Oh Mr. Yasso...

So, last night I decided that I would do some of those oh so famous Yasso 800s. No big deal right? I figured that I'm still a ways out from the marathon, and he suggests you start them 2 months out, so I thought "I'm gonna kill these things, I'm in such good shape right now!". NOT SO. I decided to start with 3 (eventually you are supposed to work up to 10 in your marathon predictor time, i.e. want to run a 3:30 marathon = run 10 800s each in 3 minutes 30 sec... in case you aren't familiar with this form of torture!).

The UF track is packed, I have a really hard time parking. All these shirtless people looking very serious. They're coaches everywhere I swear. I stroll up feeling pretty confident about this workout that I am going to tear up before heading over to run some slower miles at the ramps with a friend. First thing that puts me out of place is my headphones, I'm not sure where but somewhere there must be a rule that headphones on the track are an abomination because I swear everyone is glaring at me when I walk up. It might have also been that technically the track isn't open till 6pm to the public (I was there at 5:45pm), but there were a couple larger individuals walking so I felt better about that "rule".

I start with a nice easy 400 warm up. I was going to warm up for a mile or so, but because of the parking situation I was in a hurry. I have this swanky bounce in my step, jamming to my music. Okay, once around now time for the Yasso. I take off and kill the first 400 (because I did full loops it works out to be more like 440 each), then the second lap I struggle but still come in at 3:24. Not bad I think. See I could run a 3:25 marathon if I wanted... WRONG.

I do my little 3:30 recovery and then begin the second 800 (which I'm saying is 880 to make myself feel better). I start out slower, realizing that I started out a little too ambitious last time. Came in at 3:31, not bad, not bad. Still feeling pretty hot. During my little recovery I'm having the debate in my head, "well, I'm running late, maybe I should just do two."... "no, you told yourself 3, don't fall short of your goal, real runners wouldn't do 2". I think I knew what was about to happen, serious tankage. Last one is rough, I come in at 3:45. Big drop! Thank God I didn't set out to do 4!

I went to bed exhausted! My usual tossing and turning for 30 minutes while my brain sorts through stuff didn't have much power over me last night. This morning I woke up briefly to see Bill off to work and then didn't wake up till 9:45! I don't remember the last time I did that! From 3 damn 800s! ...well 880s

Humility is good for the soul... and getting your butt kicked makes you want to get back out there and kick the butt of what kicked you! So I'm determined to conquer those Yassos!

Running in Cemeteries

In the last week I've ran through two different cemeteries, on two different runs, in two different states. Neither one was a planned addition to the route, just spur of the moment, "hey, I'm gonna go in there".

I'm not sure why I'm always drawn to them. I remember taking a road trip with my lifelong friend Julie, up the east coast. We must have stopped at like 7, it was like the cemetery vacation. We took oodles of photos, spent hours amongst graves and underground bones. Personally, my plan would be cremation so my intrigue doesn't even translate to my own burial decisions.

Perhaps it's the strong sense of realness I get when entering those iron gates. The neighborhood surrounding them may be paved and decorated and humming with the days activities, but behind those gates are histories, years of sadness and joys and the reality that nothing and no one lasts forever.

Coming up on the big 30, it's beginning to sink in that if I am granted a long life, it's still about 1/3 over. I've been meandering around my 1/3 life crisis the last few months, and I've settled on not trying so hard. The expectations I've set for myself have always been just beyond what I'm doing. To some that might sound healthy, like having goals, striving for something better, but for me it's been hell. I've disliked myself most moments because I've never been good enough, never tried hard enough. I've lived in a constant state of guilt. It's a hidden misery.

I want to be done with that. My prayer is one of release. I want to let God have some room because I'm exhausted.

So, the last few months I've stepped away from my goodwill type of commitments, asking God to place small manageable things in front of me until I can handle re-entering the world of service. Yesterday, running through the cemetery I got a wave of desire to contact the person starting Girls on the Run in Gainesville (www.girlsontherun.com). As I've said before, running has become my form of worship to the Creator, so my hope is that through it he'll keep me balanced. I know what it's like to be unrecognizably depressed, put all your hope in boys, be obsessed with image, and feel like no one understands. Apparently, Girls on the Run works at dealing with those issues that affect so many pre-teens, and they do it through running and healthy lifestyles. Love it!

Cemeteries are alluring, but for now I prefer to run, very much alive, through them, acutely aware of the contrast. I'd like to think those buried there are cheering me on to live and run hard while I'm able.

Disney Half Marathon

WOW!

My week started off with three days in a row receiving sad news reports from different friends about the goings ons in their lives. I felt beat up, my heart ached badly for my friends. Empathy is funny like that I guess. It doesn't seem productive to feel others pain when there is nothing you can do to fix it. But, I realized that what we can do is be there, maybe this helps lighten the load? I'm grateful that I have the time to share that space of grief with the ones I love.

One friend lost his dad this week, with no warning. At the end of the week he played two concerts, played his guts out, lit up the room. God bless him. We all have those passions which can help us come through tragedy. Maybe that was part of God's plan all along, giving us talents not just to be enjoyed lightly but to create a spiritual link to him and his unexplainable peace.

So, on Friday (as well as Thursday and Saturday) night I got to hug my friend before he went on stage, one of those real I see you and love you kind of hugs. He made me cry with his music. Due to the concert we didn't go to bed till 1:30 AM. I stayed at Tyler's so we could head to Disney together come 4:20 AM.

Two friends of my parents had paid entries to the Disney 1/2 Marathon on Saturday and they were unable to run in the event. Tyler and I had planned on running for 2 hours together anyway, since I was going down for the concert, so we happily agreed to take their entries and have a Disney experience.

What a day! We got to Epcot at 5:00 AM and as we were waiting for the port-o-potties the SNOW was coming down! SNOW at DISNEY... REAL SNOW! It was fantastic! Magical really. During the race the snow turned to light sleet and then rain, but it was all worth it. We ran for fun not time and had a BLAST. We hooted and hollered, high fived spectators, even sang happy birthday to someone on the course. Having been one of the last 200 people to cross the start line (the original registrants are run-walkers), we were very pleased with our 2:02 finish time. I think we ran half the race on the grass or in the gutters!

This past weekend was one of the most special times I've had. I got to spend some treasured time with some of the most beautiful people I know, including my favorite author/prophet/speaker Shane Claiborne! I think I had a glimpse at what the community will be like in heaven, connecting with souls on a non-verbal level of deepness. The crap at the beginning of the week made us all vulnerable enough to need each other. I wouldn't call it God's will that crap happens, because I don't believe in that sort of deity, but I do believe in the God of love and relationships and that he is able to lead the intimacy that can come out of dark times.

DeLeon Springs 1/2 Marathon

1:44:35, PR'd by 13 minutes, placed 2nd in my age group!

What a great cold morning! I awoke at 4:20am to leave the house by 5am, to get to DeLeon Springs, race started at 8am. It was in the 20s when I woke up, so even though I like my runs cold, this was a bit too cold for the ideal Kim weather. But, nevertheless I arrived around 7am and shivered my way over to pick up my number and shirt and stand in the bathroom line.

It was a small race, only 167 runners for the 1/2 Marathon. A simple out and back course on a rural road. It was cheap, flat and semi-local, so it was great!

I started the first mile "slow" and then gave myself the liberty to speed up. From the first .10 mile I noticed an intense arch pain in my right foot. If you had asked me at mile 1 if I thought I was going to be able to complete the race I would have said no. But, I took 1 mile at a time, and it hurt like hell the whole way. What was it? Who really knows, I've never felt that pain before, not even slightly, but my suspicion is that it had something to do with the massage I got on Wednesday. Wendy (my massage therapist) worked on that particular foot for awhile, she said it was starting to buckle. My guess is something was loosened and wasn't prepared for an intense run. It's still sore today, but I'm hoping this week of running it will resolve itself.

So, I know in certain circles PRIDE is almost like a four letter word (even though it's five). But, I'm not ashamed to say that I'm proud of myself. I know I couldn't do any of this without the gift of my body, my health, and my husband, but I still have worked really hard to improve this quickly. It's been really fun overall, but there are still some days where I flat out just don't want to put on those darn running shoes. But running a sub 8:00 min/mile pace for a 1/2 marathon and feeling good doing it (minus the foot thing) makes it all worth it!

I just can't believe that this Boston Qualifying goal is actually reachable, like realistically reachable. It's moved from a maybe someday way far off to really really close.